


Only Temporary

by Aquielle



Series: DSB: Drabbles [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Feels, M/M, human!Cas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-20
Updated: 2015-04-20
Packaged: 2018-03-24 23:34:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3788479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aquielle/pseuds/Aquielle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the prompt "Farewell"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Only Temporary

**Author's Note:**

> A-  
> An abundance of feels is never a bad thing.  
> -K

"Cas....you can't stay here"

It holds the distinct honor of being probably the most regrettable thing Dean has ever said. As soon as the words left his mouth he wanted to swallow them back up.

If only they had hung there for a few seconds before slamming into Cas like a Mack truck. If only he had the time to soften the blow. If only he could have tempered his desperation to save Sam. If only. His life seemed like an endless series of if only's.

Dean was shit at goodbyes so he told himself this was only until Sam was better, only till things calmed down and evened out. He packed a bag for Cas while he swallowed the lump in his throat, his eyes stinging and the mantra of "only temporary" on repeat in his head.

The drive to the bus station had been excruciating in it's silence. Cas just keep looking at him with that hurt expression of shock. Trying to come up with more lies was just making it worse so he spent the trip silently glancing at Cas in his periph willing him to understand that this wasn't forever, it wasn't permanent, it would be over as soon as possible.

Thirty minutes of waiting on shitty plastic benches, $400.00 in cash, a fake credit card, a burner phone and a bag full of Dean's clothes and energy bars later he watched the greyhound heading for Iowa pull away muttering "only temporary" to himself.

He walked back to the Impala and sat with his heels pressed into his eyes for twice as long as would considered acceptable for a temporary farewell and it didn't stop the pressure headache from taking root.

The last words he had said to Cas were "please call me."

Cas didn't call him for three weeks, and Dean didn't feel like he had the right to disrupt his new life just because he was a selfish bastard who missed the sound of his voice.

Self-flagellation being a hobby Dean seemed to be fond of in his advanced years, so he mother-henned via text.

He sent texts asking if Cas was okay, was he eating enough, did he need more money. Cas became very fluent in frowny face emojis and the words "I'm fine."

When he finally did hit that green call button it was to ask Dean the most random and exasperated "why are humans so odd about everything" questions.

They settled into a routine, they spoke every other day or so. He knew that Cas was working and had acclimated fairly well but that didn't take the clipped, bitchy tone out of his voice.

The tone that stabbed at him from hundreds of miles away.

The tone that accused him of abandoning his newly human friend/angel/too-damn-important-to-not-be-family!

That tone tore at the very core of him every time he heard it.

His breathing became too fast and his brain would race. _He went through literal Hell for you and this is what you did. What the actual fuck were you thinking sending him out there all alone Winchester? You son of a bitch he's too good for you, you don't deserve him._

One particular Thursday night Cas called at 2:47 am breathless and scared after experiencing his first nightmare and Dean almost broke right then and there.

The aching in his chest almost too big for his rib cage to contain. He soothed Cas with quiet words and coos until his breathing calmed and grew deep, just before he was about to hang up he heard Cas whisper his name and the sob that broke from him almost startled him. "I miss you" he said as he hung up unsure if he wanted his angel to hear him or not.

Not even a week later Cas supplied him with the excuse he needed to make sure it really was only temporary.

He knew that showing up was not a great idea when he saw Castiel's reaction, but he couldn't stay away, he was only human and a greedy one at that.

The night they spent together in Dean's motel crystallized the fact that Cas was indeed truly human and it lead to a deeper feeling of need for both of them.

The next farewell was melancholy, but it was understood. Dean belonged with Cas and Cas belonged with Dean.

This was in fact only temporary.


End file.
